True Joy

Man, alot of things are swirling through my mind and it is flipping me out because this is different then the other hardships that I so recently faced in life. I wasn't going to come out and just post it everywhere, but I must so that Jesus can get glory for being the Majestic King that He is. My Paw Paw has been in the hospital here lately and it seemed as though he got bad news in the first place that he had diabetes along with other complications. Well, he gos on about his business but the pain and the tiredness he was feeling finally overwhelmed him and him and my grandma went over to the hospital. To make a long story short its been over a week now and he is still in there. Paw is so brave and tough because doctors are not his thing and if it wasn't really bad then he would not see a doc. To make a long story short test after test that they have run came back with bad prognosis. We just found out two nights ago that he has cancer. Its not just a spot that they are looking at but cancer in his bones and he just has alot of gunk gone wrong. This is absolutely one of the hardest things that anyone has to hear.
The guy is one heck of a fellow, he has always taken me out to do the manly stuff such as camping and fishing. Man, there is not one time where I can look back and say he was not a factor in my life. When I was 3 and 4 I remember him reading to me and playing school with me and my sister. I remember him taking us to swing at the park every time they would come over. He grew one mean garden, and grew even better fish stories. Something that always impressed me is that He truly loved my nanny and still does. He had no issues doing dishes after dinner and viewed it as "my chores" but not with a dislike, rather just a "I gotta do em". He didnt ever complain...and that is crazy...dishes really suck people! The man can catch a fish in the craziest water conditions with a topwater. He let me do a couple donuts in his boat, wait he didn't really want me to do that...nevermind, but in the end we laughed. He helped me learn how to fillet a fish. He made fun of me when I fell asleep on a guys shoulder that I never met....one time that he took me to work with him on his big truck. The man could dance any kind of dance country western wise and had a hop to him that I could never learn.
Why do I say this? Because I love this man with everything I got and though this news was completely horrid, my heart drops, and I am reduced to tears, I see amazing things. I see a God that has provided me with a family that cares. I see a God that placed me in situations to learn from my paw paw. I see a God that does not sit idly by and let us suffer because we absolutely should rot and go to hell...but yet he doesn't let that happen. I am reminded that because of my relationship with God through Jesus Christ that whether a sickness comes, I lose someone, or anything else happens in this life that His glory continues to spill out because He is God and blessed be the name of the Lord. Joy doesn't come in circumstances of emotion, but in knowing that Jesus Christ paid a price so that I could be free and with my Father in Heaven. So while alot of things seem grim in alot of ways.....I can see right now the glory of an amazing God that deserves worship and us at his feet giving praise. This all happens and is crazy, but another thing happened. Someone close to me lost a grandpa and His grandpa was a great man. A friend of mine called to ask me for prayer for someone the other day that is in the service in Iraq because he was exposed to some form of chemical that was causing him to have seizures and all sorts of issues. My friend that lost his grandpa happens to be my brother in law by the way, and his sister lost her job. Another person had issues with her father going to the hospital for a mini stroke. A guy had some major issues with an ex that will obviously effect him for a long time. Why do I say stuff about this? Because through all this crap is where we find how amazing Jesus is. The King above all Kings. The Messiah and Savior is looking down on us and cares for us...but most importantly he is smiling because He knows what he already conquered so that His followers will not have to worry about these things. Because of that there is joy...because of that there is an amazing thing. Romans 8----the later half...I yearn for you Jesus and your return. For your glory I will follow you with faith that you know everything and I know nothing. I follow you because you were there before time began and before the world and universe came about. Through the cross I look at this time and know there is nothing that will come for anyone that they cannot find joy in because of Him. Everyone look for Christ...He is the rock.

Holy design
this place in time
that i might seek and find my God
my God

Lord i want to yearn for You
i want to burn with passion
over You and only You
Lord i want to yearn

Your joy is mine
yet why am i fine
with all my singing and bringing grain
in light of Him

oh You give life and breath
through Him You give all things
in Him we live and move
that's why i sing

(Acts 17:25-28, Hebrews 12:28-29)